Death wears business casual now—coffee in one hand, your soul in the other.
Welcome to the ninth circle of corporate hell, where the air smells like burnt coffee and shattered ambition. Introducing the “Per My Last Email” Reaper Tee—your official uniform for spiritually decaying under fluorescent lights while pretending to “circle back.”
This ain’t your grandma’s Grim Reaper. This one’s got a 401(k), a stale mug that says #1 Middle Manager, and the dead eyes of someone who’s been on mute since 2019. He’s not collecting souls—he’s collecting unread Slack threads and passive-aggressive calendar invites.
We printed this beauty on black cotton darker than your manager’s sense of empathy and softer than your will to live during Q4. It’s breathable, flexible, and perfect for surviving 37 back-to-back Zooms without leaving your chair—or your body.
Rock it on Casual Fridays, revenge-resignations, or while Googling “how to fake a Wi-Fi outage convincingly.” Whether you’re whispering “I quit” into a throw pillow or manifesting a mild illness before your next performance review, this tee says it all: you’re dead inside, and it’s above your pay grade to pretend otherwise.
Grab yours before your soul gets reassigned to the Monday metrics deck.
More details
- Solid colors are 100% ring-spun cotton
- Sport Grey is 90% ring-spun cotton, 10% polyester
- Dark Heather is 65% polyester, 35% cotton
- Lightweight fabric: 4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²)
EU GPSR Product Information:
- Manufacturer contact information
- Name: Beefthroat
- Email: contact@support.beefthroat.com
- Postal address: PO Box 5696 Santa Monica, CA 90405
- Additional information: This product is made for adults. Meets the flammability, lead, cadmium, bisphenols and phthalates level requirements. 2 year warranty in EEA and UK, established by Directive 1999/44/EC.
Size & Fit
Quality Guarantee & Returns
- Quality is guaranteed. If there is a print error or visible quality issue, we'll replace or refund it.
- Because the products are made to order, we do not accept general returns or sizing-related returns.
Death wears business casual now—coffee in one hand, your soul in the other. Size Guide
| Size label | Length | Width | Sleeve length |
|---|---|---|---|
|
S
|
28
|
18
|
16.75
|
|
M
|
29
|
20
|
17.88
|
|
L
|
30
|
22
|
19.13
|
|
XL
|
31
|
24
|
20.38
|
|
2XL
|
32
|
26
|
21.63
|
|
3XL
|
33
|
28
|
22.75
|